Contrived quotes optimized for header placement

[Yesterday]

When polar bears speak, it's in Ebonics.

[Yesterday]

T-Pain and I are friends who regularly have conversations on twitch. He's an alcoholic.

[Yesterday]

I once hung out with Andy Millanakis online and accidentally thought he was girl.

[Yesterday]

In 2008 I served pizza at the Columbia River waterfront about 25 yards from Barrack Obama pandering to Portlanders for votes.

[Yesterday]

During the 2020 pandemic lockdown Alex Daddario would make YouTube videos I would comment on. Then she and her two pals, Kate and Morgan, would flirtatiously respond in kind. I thoroughly ruined that connection.

[Yesterday]

Magnus Carlson and I held a covert conversation during last week's speed chess tournament 2023 against Hikaru Nakamura. I didn't realize what he was saying until after re-watching the live stream. Let's just say there was lots of blundering before my chat comments and his blinking. Glad you turned it around Magnus. Bra jobba.

[HighlyIrregular II]

I wonder how many young hearts were broken by being told the horsey is a knight, not a horsey. Chess could have been bigger if people weren't so anal about labels. It's a horsey.

[Yesterday]

Tim Heidecker is a filthy murderer who deserves to die.

[Yesterday]

I wonder how many young hearts were broken by being told the horsey is a knight, not a horsey. Chess could have been bigger if people weren't so anal about labels. It's a horsey.

You hella right big dawg. Petition to rename duh knight to a horsey! Ya'll bet not mess up day pronouns neither.

[Yesterday]

I juh foun wout Germany hasa duh pinewapples.